Looks Like the End
by Duck Life
Summary: What we didn't see in 3x11, "Nikki Heat". Ryan/Jenny. Twoshot, maybe threeshot. Please R&R!
1. Chapter 1

Jenny scanned the bullpen, but her boyfriend was nowhere to be found. Sighing, she slid his cell phone back into her purse and turned to ask someone where he was. To her luck, Javier strode up. "Hey," he said. "Looking for Ryan?" It was weird to hear his coworkers call him that. To her, he was always just "Kevin". Maybe if she spent more time at the precinct she would get more used to hearing it.

"Yeah," she smiled. "He left his cell phone at home."

"He's down in the morgue," Esposito informed her. She nodded her thanks, assuming that the room with all the dead people was off-limits for her. She resolved to stay by Kevin's desk until he returned.

"How was darts last night?" she said to Javier, trying to be friendly. Kevin hadn't said much last night, just that they had had fun.

"What?" he replied, confused.

"With Kevin," she elaborated. "He said you two were playing darts last night."

"No," he said. Just then, Captain Montgomery beckoned Esposito from across the room. "I have to go. Maybe R- Kevin was talking about someone else or something." He shrugged and walked away, leaving her standing there in the middle of the precinct, lost and bewildered.

"Hey." She jumped at the voice, spinning around to see Kevin smiling at her. "What are you doing here?"

"Uh…" She pulled out his cell phone and handed it to him. "You left that at home. I just talked to Javier and he said that you two didn't play darts last night." She said it like a question, having no idea of what was going on. She could immediately tell from his expression that he had lied about going out with Javier last night. As a cop and as a poker player, he was a pretty decent bluffer, but when it came to lying to his girlfriend, he could barely pull off throwing her a surprise party. "Kevin?"

Detective Karpowski walked by at that moment and stopped to say hello to Jenny. They'd met the day that Ryan had brought her to the precinct. "Here to meet Natalie?" she asked.

"Natalie?" she said. She wasn't looking at Karpowski, she'd returned her gaze to Kevin.

"Yeah, Natalie Rhodes," she continued. "She's here following Beckett. The whole precinct's been buzzing about it." Detective Karpowski headed away towards the break room. Jenny stared open-mouthed at Kevin as all the pieces came together. She could clearly picture the name "Natalie Rhodes" scrawled in his handwriting on the Freebie Five list he had made a few months ago. It was then that she realized what was going on.

"Oh, my God," she spat at him, her face screwing into a scowl. One step behind her, he needed to stare at her in confusion for a few seconds before realization simmered to the surface.

"No!" he cried. "No, no, no, it's not- Jenny-" She felt like she was choking. It was one of those things that just crashed down on you and left you gasping for breath. She couldn't even imagine it, but it was true: Kevin was cheating on her. After everything- two years together, meeting the people he considered his family, that night after the Triple Killer had attacked him when she'd stayed awake, trying to find some way to make him feel better- and he had just turned around and betrayed her?

He knew full well that neither of them had been serious about those lists. Really, where was she ever going to run into Ryan Reynolds? Or he, Juliana Dever? The lists were a joke, and to think he had actually acted on it…

"I can't even look at you." She stormed off, forcefully, speeding up to a run when she realized that she was about to cry.

"Jenny!" he called, following her. "Wait!" They ran past Beckett and Castle, who both looked bewildered. "Sweetie, can we just talk about this?" He was desperate, actually reaching out as if he could pull her back into his arms and tell her the truth.

She couldn't believe that he wanted to _talk _about it. As if it were just a simple mistake, as if a nice, long conversation about how he had turned his back on her and slept with the first famous floozy to set foot in the 12th precinct would make everything okay again.

Natalie stepped out of the elevator just as she reached it. There were a few things she wanted to say to the actress, most of them words she had never uttered before. Still, it wasn't Natalie's fault. She wasn't in a relationship, and Kevin probably hadn't even mentioned that he had a girlfriend. There was a past tense there already, and that hurt Jenny even more.

"I hate you, Kevin Ryan," she said, shoving him away from the elevator. He looked so _broken_. His expression was so bleak, crying would have made him seem happier. She had a second of doubt then, that maybe she should just listen to what he had to say, but by then the elevator doors were already closed.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: This takes place during the "Is Castle Gay?" conversation, after Castle says he's going to check on Ryan. **

Ryan sighed, wondering if he should even bother trying to call her again. He'd stopped counting after eight times, and every time he'd gotten her voicemail. It was a small comfort to hear her voice. He'd called their apartment, too, and had listened to their cheesy two-person outgoing message. It reminded him of a happier time, back when she had actually allowed him in her presence.

He couldn't even concentrate on the case, and he knew that was bad. Beckett had mercifully assigned him the task of screening a surveillance tape in real time, a procedure that required little brainwork. He was supposed to be a homicide detective, not a heartbroken teenage girl waiting for the phone to ring. Most people would turn to some form of alcohol after the love of their life ran out on them, but what he really wanted was a warm mug of honey milk. And Jenny.

"Still no luck?" guessed Castle, walking up to his desk. He shook his head wearily. "Maybe I should try."

"You think that will work?" he asked skeptically, glancing up from Tweeting "Call me Jenny XOXO".

"She'll answer if it's not you," he said. It didn't make Ryan feel any better. "Give me her number." He did, each digit painful on his lips because it reminded him of _her_. This couldn't be long-term. It would kill him. "Hello," he said smoothly. She'd picked up when she realized that it wasn't Ryan. "This is Richard Castle, mystery writer and New York's ninth most eligible- hello?" Ryan stared at him dubiously. Without a word, Castle redialed using Ryan's work phone. This time, he spoke in his Christopher Walken impression. "Take him back!" He hadn't really expected her to not hang up.

"Did you even have a plan?" asked Ryan.

"I've been divorced twice," he said. "Did you honestly expect that to work?"

"What was with the impression?" he asked, wishing that Castle had an actual idea that might help him contact Jenny. He was seriously close to just roaming the streets in hope of stumbling upon her.

"I thought it would help," he shrugged. "If I were in love with you and you got Christopher Walken to call me, I'd forgive you."

"Okay, we're getting into some weird territory here," said Ryan. He speed-dialed Jenny yet again. She didn't answer. He still had the jewelry box in his pocket, and the weight of it was beginning to drive him insane. He shoved it in his desk drawer without looking at it, hoping desperately that he would still get a chance to use it.

"Talk to me," Beckett said hurriedly, appearing beside Castle.

"'Bout what?" he said.

"Anything," she said, still in a rush. "I don't know, the weather."

"Well, I think the temperature is heating u-"

"No, nothing about heat!" she snapped, rubbing her temple as if she had a headache. "Sorry. I needed to get away from my evil twin."

"What's the policy on… GPS tracking Jenny's phone?" asked Ryan, not even listening.

"She'll call when she's ready," Beckett assured him. He sighed, wishing she could be ready sooner. This had been the worst day of his life and it wasn't even lunchtime yet.

o-o-o-o-o-o

Finally, after what must have been around fifty phone calls, she answered. Just realizing that it hadn't gone to voicemail sent a wave of almost overwhelming relief through Ryan. "Jenny," he said with exuberance.

"Stop calling me, Kevin," she replied coldly. "I don't want to talk to you."

"Fine, don't talk," he said quickly. "Just listen." He didn't hear a response, but he also didn't hear her hang up. He took that as a good sign. "I love you so much, and I would never do anything to hurt you. I promise I wasn't with Natalie Rhodes last night- I wasn't with anyone! This is all a huge misunderstanding. I need you, Jenny. I can't imagine my life without you. Please…" It wasn't much different than leaving her a voicemail message, but at least he knew she was listening. "I love you," he repeated. She was quiet for a moment.

"I'll meet you at the precinct," she said quietly. Her voice cracked; he wondered if she had been crying. "I don't want to do this over the phone." And then the call was over. He sat there staring at his phone, terror seeping into his stomach. Do what over the phone?

"Do what over the phone?" he found himself whispering nervously. Esposito's head popped up over the top of his computer monitor.

"What's up?" he asked, sinking into the rolling chair beside his partner's desk.

"I'm going to die alone," he said, banging his forehead on his desk. "Ow."

"You're not gonna die alone," Esposito reassured him. "You can spend holidays with me."

"I don't know, that's a little pathetic," he said. "Two lonely guys, hanging out on Christmas?"

"Who said anything about lonely?" he snorted in response. "I'll be married."

"Married?" asked Ryan, raising his eyebrows.

"Look at me," he said. "If you were a woman, wouldn't you want me to be your husband?"

"Why do people keep saying things like that to me?" he grumbled. The banter was actually making him feel calmer. Calmer, but not happier. He wouldn't be happy until he had Jenny back, and unfortunately, he was beginning to fear that that would never happen.


	3. Chapter 3

Jenny stood at the entrance to the bullpen, taking yet another deep breath. She could hear Kevin and Javier talking about the case around the corner. She'd always been good at admitting when she was wrong, it was something she considered a virtue. She'd made a big mistake that morning, had judged too quickly, and now she was just hoping that Kevin would forgive her.

While she had been ignoring his calls, she'd also been contemplating her situation and wondering what she was supposed to do. After a while, she had come to the conclusion that she actually did believe Kevin. If he told her that he wasn't with the actress last night, then that was the truth. She could have looked for proof he wasn't lying (no doubt the paparazzi had been on Natalie Rhodes all night) but she didn't want proof. That was an upside of falling in love, she decided. Unfailing trust. (She'd work harder on that in the future.)

"Hi, guys," said Jenny, stepping out from her hiding place. They were all watching – Javier, Detective Beckett, even the writer. Before she could be embarrassed, though, Kevin wrapped his arms around her waist and told her how happy he was to see her. She guessed that he was opting for forgiveness. "I'm sorry about before," she said. "I made a scene-"

He tried to talk then, probably to apologize for something he hadn't even done, but she cut him off. "No, listen. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, Kevin, and I want you to know that I love you and I trust you."

She could see the apprehensive look in his eyes, doubting that she really did trust him, and that killed her. After a pointed glance at Javier, who then walked away with an amused expression on his face, Kevin spoke. "Jenny, I lied to you," he admitted. "But I'm going to set the record straight." There were bubbles in her stomach, and she wasn't sure if she should be nervous. "Just wait here for a second."

Ryan ran to his desk and pulled out the soft black box he'd set in his desk drawer that morning. His fingers were shaking as he hastily shut the drawer. What if she said no? What if she left him? Somehow during the walk from his desk back to Jenny he had time to come up with about ten other devastating possibilities.

"I didn't play darts with Javier last night." So he had lied, but about what she wasn't completely sure yet. "I went to see your parents… because I had a question for them." And then she knew. Given the turbulence of the day, this was the last place she had expected to end up. Despite that, Jenny realized it was exactly where she wanted to be. She was so happy that she almost didn't hear what Kevin said next. She was glad she did, though, because they were the most important words to ever come out of his mouth.

"Jennifer Scout Duffy-O'Mally, will you make me the happiest guy in the world and marry me?" He was down on one knee, holding out the ring like they were in some kind of fairy tale. She was caught up in the moment, picturing her wedding, spending the rest of her life with Kevin, having kids, growing old with him, buying a house together out of the city after they'd retired with a glossy white porch swing and a rose garden in the backyard.

And then she realized that she still hadn't answered him. Words. Words would be good. "Oh my God…" she whispered. She spluttered, trying to say yes while overwhelmed with emotion.

"Yes," he supplied. She smiled, her eyes flooding with tears as he slid the sparkling engagement ring onto her finger. When they kissed, she swore she could hear dove wings beating.

No, not doves- applause. The entire bullpen was clapping for them. She felt like clapping, too. They'd made it. Finally, after everything they'd gone through, they'd made it.


End file.
